i’ll just do 2000 – 2005 first… ;)

2000
- graduated from poly and found a job as a writer/producer for vivamusic.com (a now-defunct online portal of music and entertainment news)
- decided to go australia for studies. it was a die-die must go thing… i refused to look at other courses in singapore… i wanted to get out!!

2001
- if my memory serves me well… i started making arrangements to go australia for my bachelor degree studies
- quit the first job that i had after i graduated from poly (vivamusic.com) because of that as well…
- can’t rem but perhaps my ’sorta’ ex-bf broke up wif me in that year too? hrmmm…
- decided to go QUT for my studies
- attended the briefing session held at my poly and met my friend there… she would go on to be my housemate and one of my best friends =)
- LEFT FOR AUSTRALIA!!!! it was the BESTEST day of my life at that point in time… =D i can still bring up that emotion of being at the airport and eager to just step through the departure gates!
- also it was the first time i took a plane… and the first time i travelled ALONE!
- though my fren and i did make loads of contingency plans (think there were four at one point?) in case we weren’t able to meet up in brisbane…
- first semester in QUT and staying in brisbane was quite fun mixed with a bit of culture shock coz brisbane was soooo much more laid back compared to singapore
- hung out with a bunch of singaporeans (i know… =P) for the semester and we had loads of fun gatherings during that time…
- most memorable was shifting houses in the middle of the night becoz two of them didn’t want to pay the rent for an empty room… hahaha ‘zao lor’
- took a road trip from brisbane to sunshine coast and down to gold coast… roundabouts are not a good place to figure out whether you’re lost or not…
- got together with km

2002 – 2003
- school was fun with alot of projects and no exams… i clever right! ;)
- visited sydney for three days, discovered that the opera house looks white in photos but actually wasn’t… >=/
- volunteered at one of brisbane’s hospitals manning the children’s play area one day every week. seeing kids of different ages being treated for diseases like cancer etc was quite a sobering experience
- helped out at a local theatre production doing the on-screen visuals… it was an interesting experience i must say…
- volunteered as one of the student-editors for the (now defunct) Fineart Forum… interviewed my first artist… i rem he was Japanese and i had quite a hard time trying to figure out what to ask him… lol
- cleaning up the house at the end of our rental was an experience… i think i was semi-high from smelling cleaning liquid fumes in the shower… also a good tip for you: always clean the blades of the fan coz they do check! ;P

2004
- worked at expat living magazines for around three months and decided i didn’t want to do so much writing
- worked at a realllly small home and living magazine that closed down after one month (heh)
- worked at haagen daz as an ice-cream seller… something that i’ve always wanted to do for some strange reason
- worked at borders as a bookseller… another thing that i’ve always wanted to do for some strange reason…
- had more fun at borders compared with haagen daz.. but working at an F&B outlet really showed me what singaporeans are reallllly like… heh.

2005
- worked as a freelance designer/visualiser at a realllly small ad agency… it was fun for a while…
- went back to borders for a while… i think?
- found a job at a chemical company dealing with textile dyes etc… located in tuas and uber out of the way… -_-”
- sorta had some fun creating brochures for them… cut and pasting textiles and liasing with printers…
- in a stroke of coincidence managed to get myself the job that i’m working at now… =D

• I direct my thoughts and desires in such a way that it is positive and that will manifest into the results I want.
• I effect positive change in my life.
• I increase my “value” contribution to society.
• I have the courage to bring my personal relationships to a deeper level.
• I build meaningful and close bonds with more friends.
• I travel to Europe in 2010.
• I save 5K by June plus another 3K by end of the year.
• I pursue work that challenges and inspires me.
• I adopt a healthier lifestyle.
• Blogo due volte per mese in Italiano.

this list together with some additional points are now up on the side of this blog as well so that i can be reminded of it… it is also in my iPod Touch AND my moleskine… hehehehehe…

at the moment i’m more concerned about the ‘creating value’ portion vs attracting abundance into my life… but recently steve pavlina wrote a post titled ‘overcoming cheapness‘ which really resonated in me deeply. as i read the post, i found myself readily identifying with many of the points he raised and being surprised at some of the ‘positive thinking’ thoughts that he raised (gave me a ‘ohh… never thought of it that way’ kind of a feeling)…

i am a visual person… i have to go out to town and take a walk around just to check out what’s happening in the stores… seeing beautiful things really gives me a good buzz and many times i’ve literally ‘LUSTED’ over many of the things i’ve seen… leading to quite a bit of impulse buys… but of coz, due to my personal ‘block’ of ‘not enough money to buy this or that’… i often find myself compromising or not buying the item at all… so this post really opened up my eyes on wat i should do in order to release the blocks to abundance, identify and maintain myself in that higher state of vibration where i can have what i desire… and i do desire the most expensive things when i go out shopping.. ahahha could be the leo in me~

actually i have already caught the gist of this when i was in uni… my fren/housemate used to buy the cheapest, most value-for-money household items which inevitably broke down or was not as good/durable/long-lasting as she thought… and though sometimes i do go along with her purchases… i personally preferred to buy things that were more expensive but gave me a good feeling when i’m using it (toilet paper is a very, very good example… trust me… ;P) and in the long run we realised that cheapest does not equate to good value… at the same time, it really doesn’t give you a good feeling…

back in singapore, i often buy food or things back home that i think my parents would consider expensive (if i told them how much it really cost.. hehehe) but at the end of the day, they always enjoy them much more than the ‘alternatives’ eg: the yummy chocolate croissants from provence cafe – costs a whole lot more than the cheaper ones in breadtalk, four leaves etc… but taste oh so much nicer!

so for food i am learning not to deny myself (too much.. hehehe), eat the food that makes me happy without being too concerned about the price… this is precisely what steve’s post is talking about…

How can I afford it?

Once you’ve identified what you really want, then take note of the price. If you can easily afford it, go ahead and buy it. It’s what you want after all. Don’t block yourself. Don’t be a cheapskate. What do you think money is for anyway? Do you think you’ll get more joy out of life by staring at your bank balance?

If affording the desired item seems like it would be a financial challenge, then ask yourself, “How can I afford this?” Is it really out of your league, or is it possible that you could earn it? If you come up with a way to intelligently afford the item, then make it so. Don’t hold yourself back.

Could you afford the item by having a garage sale to get rid of some of your old junk? Could you put in a few more hours at work? Could you pounce on an opportunity that you’ve been dismissing? Could you come up with a way to create and deliver more value, thereby boosting your income? Could you acquire the item creatively, such as by bartering for it.

Do NOT obsess over the price of the item. Do NOT worry about whether or not it’s a good value relative to your income.

Obsess over your desire instead. Hold the intention to acquire the item with ease. Imagine that it’s already yours. Picture yourself enjoying it. Feel grateful for it in advance. Think about how much you’ll appreciate it.

If you do this right and avoid blocking yourself, you’ll find that something rather amazing happens. The money you need may simply show up in your life. A new opportunity may present itself that makes it easy to get the money. The item itself may come into your life through an expected turn of events. The item may go on sale, making it affordable for you.

Be watchful for synchronicities related to the item. Follow them.

Desire acts like a magnet. Once you tune into your desires, allow your desires to manifest. Don’t block yourself by returning to thoughts of scarcity. Don’t assume you can’t have what you want. Don’t think about settling for a less desirable substitute. Know that what you want is already coming to you.

As far as the universe is concerned, there’s no difference between a $10 item and a $10,000 item.  The reason the $10K item seems more difficult to manifest is because of your beliefs. You believe it’s harder to manifest, and so it is.

Mmmm… now thinking back… i realised that my simply gorgeous/beautiful/well-lusted-over jacket and the gorgeous blue dress (both bought from mango) just came from my consistent obsession over them! let me explain a bit further…

1. Jacket

i had already wanted to buy a military-inspired jacket (with the shoulder bits) since last year… when i was in taipei, everytime i went out shopping, i would keep an eye out for any jackets that was similar to wat i had in mind… but unfortunately they were all guy jackets (which didn’t fit well on me)… and it was equally impossible to find in singapore… that was till i went to mango’s sale where my eyes were arrested by the jacket i eventually bought… in fact at the first mango store… the jacket i saw was in a size S and missing a button (no spares…) then i decided to take a gamble and go to another outlet to check it  out.. and there was just one M size left!! you can imagine my joy.. ahhaha and at a price of $69… i didn’t even think twice but bought it immediately… =D in fact i was so happy with my find that i didn’t have to buy a single thing for the rest of the day… lol

2. Blue gown/dress

okay i wasn’t really looking for a gown… since i seldom attend dinners or events that would require me to wear one…  but with my friend’s wedding in august… i wanted to see if i could find something nice to wear as well… somehow this dress caught my eye when i was (once again) at mango… but when i first saw it at the start of june… it was going for $125 and there was only one size M left… i tried it… loved it and decided not to buy it (since i have no need for it…) nonetheless after that… every time i went to mango.. i would peek at the racks to see if the dress was available in size M or cheaper… without much thought that i would actually buy it… however just last week… when i went past the same mango store where i first saw the dress… the price had been slashed to an amazing $85!! okok there were only S sizes left… butttttt i got the last one with the brooch still on… ahahha really made me very pleased that now i do have a nice gown to wear for my friend’s wedding… ;)

let me leave you with this last thought from steve’s post:

Appreciation and gratitude

When you get what you want, receive it with gratitude. Take time to appreciate it. Enjoy it fully.

Give yourself the message that you can have whatever you desire. You just have to identify it and claim it.

This is how to live in harmony with abundance.

okies time to start practising more of that!

Your Existing Situation
Sensitive; needs esthetic surroundings, or an equally sensitive and understanding partner with whom to share a warm intimacy.

Your Stress Sources
Has an unsatisfied need to ally herself with others whose standards are as high as her own, and to stand out from the herd. This desire for preeminence isolates her and inhibits her readiness to give herself freely. While she wants to surrender and let herself go, she regards this as a weakness which must be resisted. This self-restraint, she feels, will lift her above the rank and file and ensure recognition as a unique and distinctive personality.

Your Restrained Characteristics
Circumstances are such that she feels forced to compromise for the time being if she is to avoid being cut off from affection or from full participation.
The situation is preventing her from establishing herself, but she feels she must make the best of things as they are.

Your Desired Objective
Seeks success, stimulation, and a life full of experience. Wants to develop freely and to shake off the shackles of self-doubt, to win, and to live intensely. Likes contacts with others and is enthusiastic by nature. Receptive to anything new, modern, or intriguing; has many interests and wants to expand her fields of activity. Optimistic about the future.

Your Actual Problem
Takes a delight in action and wants to be respected and esteemed for her personal accomplishments

that’s the kinda-important bits to do (Tier 3 triage as what Steve Pavlina would say)… and below are the ’still got time to do’ things…

• do more research for trip next year
• look for pple who will go on trip with me
• clear up my table – always an on-going never-ending process…

hrmm… yeah…

i like his writing style of using words like  ‘world domination’, ‘ass-kicking’ etc in a positive and encouraging manner. will definitely visit often! =)

I promised my colleague to do this once she has done hers… and she has so here’s my very own list of 25 Things…

1. I take really good care of my gadgets. My first CD player (Sony!) lasted me at least more than 3 years and looked like new on the outside but I had to get the gears replaced cause it was worn out. Then I passed it to my sister who promptly spoilt it… =(

2. My first soft toy (that I remembered) was a cloth-print rabbit that I named “Dolly” even though he was a boy. He went through many reincarnations (basically my parents just bought back the same doll and I continued the name) and even though the last one is now disintegrating, I still haven’t thrown him away. He’s folded in half in a plastic bag somewhere in my house… =P

3. My siblings and I created a whole universe for all our toys in my house. I know its childish but I don’t care. I used the same-said universe to create a proposal for a children game when I was in university and it got me good marks! ;)

4. I always felt like I had a guardian angel watching over me when I was young and so now I believe that everyone has a guardian angel too (in a non-reglious way)…

5. When I was in primary/secondary school, I received a Guess watch for my birthday that came in a Guess paperbag. The image on the paperbag was a model dressed in a white bikini with a scuba mask on her head. I brought that paperbag to school and was promptly scolded by everyone. Till this day, I have no idea what was so wrong about bringing that bag… hrmmm…

6. I learnt how to drive before I learnt how to cycle. Don’t ask me why… it just happened.

7. I cannot stand the sight or thought of snails and escargots after seeing them smeared like jam all over the pavement on a rainy day in Australia. Smeared by cyclists… gah =/

8. I love Top Gear, F1, fast cars and speeeeeeeddddd. But if you start spewing numbers of BHP etc… I will still go blank unless some form of comparison is made to things I understand. But I will probably nod in understanding if you tell me “Maybe I should get a separate set of racing tires for track purposes…”

9. My favourite supercars atm: Audi R8 (diamond eyes!!), Lamborghini. I like the font of the Porsche ‘turbo’ word though…

10. I have decided that if I have the means to buy supercars, I will buy a Porsche 911 for daily use and a Lamborghini (or Audi R8) for those special occasions. Yes… much like a normal dress for daily wear and an evening gown for wedding dinners.

11. I think phone cameras are the best invention evar. My SE K800i coupled with a 4GB MS card makes me feel very powerful… I have not had to delete a single photo since I got the card… and mind you, I set the highest res possible… mwahahahah!

12. I think I have a weird sense of humor… I find certain things funny when others don’t… *snigger*

13. The best feeling in the world to me is when I step through the Departure Gate at Changi Airport. I know I’m going somewhere exciting. You cannot even begin to fathom the sheer amount of happiness that I get!! =D

14. On Flickr, the photos of my feet after a nicely done pedicure have more hits than my other photos. That is why I think my feet are ‘pornstars’ in their own right… LOL

15. I like a nice ass on a guy. Bonus marks if he’s taller than me (when I’m in my heels) and has a good sense of humor… LOL

16. As of now I’ve only been to 5 countries: Australia (Brisbane, Sydney), Taiwan (Taipei), USA (Las Vegas), Malaysia (Genting, Cameron Highlands, Pahang) and Indonesia (Bintan, Batam). Yes… I have never been to Bangkok… or Vietnam… or Hong Kong… ‘no feeling ah’… however I will definitely go Europe!

17. I had a crew cut once when I was in poly… it was really fun to just dry my hair simply by running my towel over it. I remember looking in fascination in the mirror at my hair standing by itself… however I will not repeat it again… am loving my long hair with a fringe atm.

18. I like mashed potatoes… I can eat a tub of large KFC mashed potatoes by myself… I absolutely love the fries from the “In and Out” burger joint too – please check it out when you are in the USA.

19. The best donuts in the world to me are those from Krispy Kreme. When I was in Vegas for an event, I survived on one Original Glazed donut every day that I was at the event hall and was absolutely contented with that… together with a cup of coffee of course!

20. This is my favourite number in this list simply because its my birthdate… 20 August people… 20 August… hehehehe

21. I tried to learn how to play the piano when I was young. Unfortunately I didn’t go very far… didn’t even pass the first grade test… didn’t like to practice and I didn’t really like my teacher who kept chiding me for not practicing… LOL

22. Besides pestering my parents to let me learn the piano, I also pestered them to let me learn how to draw. My mum didn’t know where to find art classes except the nearby community centre. I remember only attending one class and in that class I had to do still life (yes it was adult drawing class!)… I remember having much difficulty doing it but felt pretty great when the teacher gave me a “D”… the teacher was very kind to direct my mum to the more appropriate art classes that were held at the PAP kindergarten school and so I was subsequently enrolled there… and learnt drawing/painting etc till I stopped in Secondary 3.

23. I like to travel, it makes me feel alive and yet small so that my ego don’t grow too huge for its own good. However I don’t like to travel alone – not because I’m scared but sometimes you just want someone there to share the amazing experiences with.

24. I have a phobia of being near underwater creatures… not too sure why but it freaks me out very much. Visiting Underwater World is stressful for me let alone diving!

25. I don’t have a huge iTunes collection as I usually just listen to the same couple of songs (of the moment) on my computer and my iPod (Shuffle or Touch). My music collection atm includes English, Italian, Mandarin, Japanese and a few German tracks… =)

Until one is committed,
there is hesitancy.
the chance to draw back,
always ineffectiveness
concerning all acts of initiative (and creation).

There is one elemental truth,
the ignorance of which kills countless ideas
and splendid plans –
that the moment one definitely commits oneself,
then Providence moves all.

All sorts of things occur to help one
that would never otherwise have occurred.

A whole stream of events
issue from the decision,
raising in one’s favor
all manner of incidents
and meetings and material assistance
which no one could have dreamed
would come his or her way.

Whatever you can do or dream you can,
begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Begin it now.

i’ve been trying to identify the paths with the heart in my life… for some areas of my life i do have some paths that i can see in front of me and for others… i know the path is there somewhat.. but right now its kinda covered in a mist/fog or even foliage… i have to figure out how to clear it so that its presented to me clearly…

what happens after you see the path? the most obvious and direct answer is to walk on it right? yes of coz… but before that… i will need to have the courage to make my feet take the first step forward… and that’s where many people are stuck… i know coz i’ve been and am there at this present moment… usually when this happens i can feel two ‘types’ of emotions… one seems to be consist of fear and generally negative (leading me to not doing anything at all but look for distractions) and the other is this exhilarating feeling that i think can be equate to the point before you step off the bungee jump platform (not tt i’ve done it before.. lol!) which is generally positive and you know somehow you will be rewarded at the end of it…

steve pavlina would probably say that the first emotion of ‘courage’ isn’t truly courage at all.. but the ego limiting oneself and i must say i agree… whereas the second is a much more rewarding form of courage because it derives from deep within yourself… and it comes frm a basis of truth and love… that is the kind of courage i am seeking to fill my life with… and the best thing is… i know it’s in me already… i’ve felt that kind of energy before and so it’s definitely not something foreign… but i think its just a matter of clearing all that mental clutter in my head when the ego start to act up so that i can access to that deeper sense of courage in me…

i tell myself this now… ‘find the path with the heart and have the courage to follow it‘ =) feels good…

i want to effect positive change in my life.

i want to work and live in europe and australia by 2010.

i will travel to europe in 2010.

i want to save $3000 by end 2009.

i will clear my credit card debt by oct 2009.

i will pursue work that challenges and inspire me.